“Common Sense Isn’t Common Anymore” is a phrase that I hear and use almost daily. What use to make perfect sense to everyone to do or not do is not the case anymore. People now need baby-step by baby-step instructions for everyday interactions.
Especially around pregnant women.
Now, this is just my opinion, with input from some friends, but I think most pregnant women would agree. Here is the start of my list
Having a baby bump does NOT give you permission to rub my belly. I mean I could go on and on, make this whole post about it but here are a few of the big reasons
- Personal Space. I get it, some people are just touchy-feely and will find any excuse to hug your or whatever. But you wouldn’t want me rubbing your non-baby belly, so why should you rub my belly.
- Maternal instincts. We are growing a little human in our wombs. That is my child. Don’t touch my child.
- Sensitive Skin. Did you know that some women actually experience sunburn like symptoms on their bellies due to the stretching. Yea, it hurts. Don’t touch.
Don’t Call A Pregnant Woman “huge”. We’re women. We can be vain. We are suppose to gain about 20 to 30 pounds in a pregnancy. We develop swelling in random places, carry water weight and have a hard time maneuvering with our protruding bellies. We already feel huge, you don’t need to point it out. And husbands, calling your wife fatty or even “phatty” is NEVER acceptable.
Don’t Ask “Is this your first?” Such an uncomfortable question for so many women. There are those who have had many miscarriages, or lost a child, that the question is just hard to answer, and it is hard for the other person to hear the answer.
Then there are those who have multiple children, and people give really weird looks when you say “It’s my 4th,” like you’re some kind of side show freak. I hate when someone responds with “Ever hear of birth control,” or even more inappropriate “Ever think of saying no.”
Children are miracles from God, a blessing to their families. Whether in our arms or in our hearts, every baby is precious.
Are you still sick? Have you tried ____?” If you have HG like me, the answer is always yes. And sometimes that’s hard for people to understand. And then they list off things that they tried to deal with their morning sickness. When you’ve been dealing with it for 20+ weeks, don’t you think a women would spend hours online looking up home remedies and old wives tales and try them all, just to feel better? You really think telling me to drink Ginger Ale at 22 weeks is going to make me say “Oh gee, why didn’t I think of that?”
Don’t offer to help if you’re not going to help. If you offer to make a pregnant women or new mom a few meals, or to come help with chores, or to watch the kids so she can sleep, and she accepts – DO IT. If you’re not going to follow through, DON’T OFFER. And, if she doesn’t accept – DO IT ANYWAY. Call and say “I made an extra dish of lasagna for dinner, can I bring it over to you?” As a mom of 3 with Hyperemesis, and a husband who works 50+ hours a week, making dinner and household chores are hard to get done.
|Veggie Lasagna… takes 5 minutes to put together.
Make one for someone!