The only places I’ve gone in the last few weeks have been work and the doctor’s office.
I miss people.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband and kids, but I use to go to networking events a few times a month. I use to go walk around the mall just because. I use to have nights out with friends.
One week before the PICC line was put in we had a game night with friends from work. It was nice. The kids were well-behaved, we got to enjoy some laughs and I didn’t get sick until we got home! (However the next day wasn’t as kind…)
I haven’t been to church in weeks… my kids really miss it, too. Steve has been training at his new job, so he hasn’t been able to take them. Does anyone even notice that we’re not there?
We haven’t made our “Facebook Official” post yet, so I can’t vent publicly. But I’m so lonely. Part of me wants to ask my husband to take a day off with me and send the kids with a baby sitter, and just spend the day with me, no responsibilities. But he needs to work, we need to save up for my maternity leave.
I’ve been invited to a few “direct sales” parties. But I don’t want to have to bring my stupid backpack with me, and then deal with the fear of getting sick at my friend’s house.
Hormones are a pain, too. It doesn’t help feeling lonely because of the isolation that the condition forces you into, to then be overly emotional while it’s happening. Really, does anyone notice that I’ve been hiding? Does anyone care?
|Kids’ last soccer practices… one of the few times I left the house